Fucking eye doctors.

1 min read - March 1, 2023

I’m on a slow glide toward blindness, at least in one eye.

That’s the feeling I get from my eye doctor. It’s not certain, but it’s what a specialist will check out. If they ever phone me back.

15 mins after the news, what did I do? I googled “how to thicken thin retinas” of course. I want swole retinas. I want my peepers yoked.

  • If there was CrossFit for the eyes, I’d take it.
  • If there was a protein shake for your eyes, I’d drop it in.

It’s a classic buying trigger.

A person gets some shitty news. They Google solutions.

But people hear shitty news all the time – what makes some triggers more triggerful than others?

I took my bike in for a tune-up once, and they told me: “if you keep going, your bike chain will become elongated… and it’ll need replacing… for $50. I can do it now”

I didn’t replace it.

  • Why does some bad news trigger action – eye doctor.
  • Why does some bad news trigger inaction – bike doctor, cheap remedy, available now.

The obvious answer*:

  • Status and authority of giver. A real doctor > bike doctor.
  • Impact on life, status.

And that’s the post today.

I’ll add it to my master document:
What makes people buy

*Why write something so obvious?

Because l want to build the most comprehensive recipe book about how to get people to buy stuff, and how Sellouts can tap into that. It starts with the obvious.